Bit of a different post today, feeling inspired to share my thoughts on a topic which I feel is extremely important. Recently there has been a lot of controversy around the subject of weight and body shape. On one end of the scale you have those who have a large body shape and on the other you have those who have a smaller body shape. The problem with all the debates on 'appreciation' of both of these body shapes is that we forget one vital thing. There are people in between these two extreme ends. Weight and body shape cannot be categorized because everyone is different. I understand we all have the right to be happy in our own skin and be who we are, however, it does not allow the degradation of those who are different from your ideals. There have been discussions over social media whereby hashtags such as #SkinnyGirlAppreciation and #PlusSizeAppreciation have been used. Personally, I think this is just making a bigger gap and problem than there was before. Yes, Skinny is seen as the social ideal, it's all over the place and can induce unrealistic aims and goals for both men and women. However, it does not justify the degradation of anyone, plus size or not. We can blame the media and social perception all we want for the amount of hate, but we are society and if we aren't willing to change and accept everyone, there is no way a change can be made.
I think it's great that plus size women are saying "hey, we are beautiful too", because you are. You look great and you rock a look that is unique and that's inspiring. But, those who are not plus size are also inspiring, we all are. All women are real women and beauty has no size. If you want to go to the gym and work your ass off for your body, you do so and don't feel guilty. If you love your curves and regard yourself as plus size, you do so and don't feel guilty. There is no need to create a hate, you have a body and that is that. Don't hate yourself and certainly don't make others feel like their body isn't good enough.
I am skinny, but I certainly do not have the body of a Victoria's Secret Model. I do not sit at home and bitch about them, because they worked hard for that body and they should be allowed to love themselves and the way the look. At the same time, I do not look at plus size women and negatively criticize them for not being like me. People don't look the way they look to impress anyone, they do it for themselves. If I buy a new dress, it's to impress me, not my friends, not my boyfriend, me. I look how I do because it's my body and it makes me feel good. I do not have a skinny frame to make anyone else feel less-confident, It's just how my genetics have made me and unfortunately, that can't change. I would love bigger boobs and more curves, but I know that's unrealistic, so instead I've made peace and make the most of what I have. With this said, I am determined to tone up over the next year, as a personal goal. This decision is made by me and for me, no-one else! I am happy with who I am, but I still like to work on myself everyday. Just because my goal is to slim down, does not mean others must do to.
On a more serious note, everyone has thing's that they would love to change about themselves, if someone already feels they have flaws, we should not add to their low self-esteem. It's easy to slate other's, however, it's also easy to forget that there are both physical and mental illnesses that can also be a huge part of the way people look/act. So next time you decide to slate another woman who isn't the same as you, just remember that they might be going through difficult times. Anorexia Nervosa, Bulimia Nervosa and Binge Eating are serious disorders that can also occur alongside with depression, anxiety and other disorders. I understand that these disorders only make up a small percentage of the population, but you never know who is suffering inside, so be kind and don't contribute to the self-hate.
We as women should be lifting each other up and encouraging self love. For a long time I hated my body, but it's the only one I'll ever have. I'm sick of seeing the hostility between everyone, it's not needed and although the media do encourage a smaller physique, it does not mean that those who are slim deserve to be punished. It also doesn't mean that you have to listen to it, the media is an opinion, not a fact. Just because someone say's a skinny model is the ideal, doesn't make it a fact. I have acne scars on both of my cheeks which do make me less confident, but I don't see those with perfect skin as a negativity in my life, that is them and this is me. So dress how you want, eat however you want to eat, look however you want to look, it's your body and do it for you, not for anyone else. You set your own values, not the media. You do you and love yourself for it because life is too short to feel anything less than fabulous.
